Anonymous said: If I send you a pic of my dick could you judge t and tell me in al,one sty what you think?

sure thing


The Don’t List

Another thing to add to the list of things I hate. I can’t claim this for the entire gender, just because I’d like to hope that it doesn’t happen that often. That the lack of common sense isn’t part of normal male behavior. But, alas, I’m sure it happens. I’m also sure there are girls that are cool with it and even high five themselves for being so forward thinking.

The mention of other girls. I get it. It doesn’t mean anything. You don’t care, I don’t care. It’s just sucking dick. And, seriously, if you give me ten minutes, I’ll have a delightful conversation about hot bitches with you. I’ll even give you advice on how to get that girl you’re really into to notice you. 

But as I’m in the process of pulling your dick out of my mouth and still trying to get the taste of you out off my tongue, I’d really rather not hear about the girl that you’re thinking of during. I’d rather not start thinking that maybe my skills suck and you’re just having a nice little daydream. 

I am under the impression that it’s a safety net. Maybe you’re worried that it matters to me more than it does to you. You don’t want to point that out because it might make you seem like an asshole. So, you attempt to make sure I know it is what it is. And that kind of makes you seem like an asshole.

Here’s the thing: If I agreed to this, I know what it is. If I’m stupid enough to go off course and get hurt, it’s my own fault. So, don’t go out of your way to be an asshole just because you think it softens the blow. It’s an agreement and it’s just sucking dick. I know that. My sensitivity isn’t because I have feelings for you. It’s an ego thing. I want to think that when I’m sucking your dick, your thinking about me sucking your dick. I’m just not the complete Ice Princess that I want to be. Sluts have feelings, too.


The Little Mermaid

Serious question time: How the fuck do underwater blowjobs work? 

I don’t know. I’ve never seriously looked into this, so there may be something that I’m missing that will make me say, “Oh, that’s what that means?” But I just saw something that mentioned it in passing and I cannot figure out the schematics of that. 

This isn’t something I’ll be adding to my to-do list anytime soon. I’ve seen too many snotty-faced snorkelers come up for air to think that this could be remotely sexy. I think it’s bad enough when I have a hard time on dry land. The gag, the frantic search for the right second to get some air, the fear that you won’t get it in time. Death by dick suffocation is not the way I want to go. Can you imagine the last thing you do in this world is not complete a blowjob? The shame. Death by dick drowning sounds even worse. 

So, this query isn’t a jump start on my next fun activity, I just really want to know. How does it work? I can probably see how you could get a few strokes down. Is that what it means? Just something to get things started, then segue into underwater sex? Is that really a proper “blowjob” though? 

I guess a quick google search would answer all my questions, but I can’t do that until later. That and I’ve really been neglecting this site. But yeah… can someone please shed some light on this?


The views expressed herein…

I’ve taken another hiatus from this thing. It was triggered because someone left me a message saying that I shouldn’t talk for all women, especially when it comes to things like facials, face fucking, and teabagging. Apparently I made it sound like all women hate it and this person was offended because she loves the teabagging and couldn’t get off if she wasn’t disrespected in the bedroom. Since I didn’t know how to reply to that without sounding like a doormat (“so sorry for offending you”) or like a bitch (“it’s my site, I’ll write what I want, biatch!”), I just put off writing at all. But it’s a slow day and I have nothing to do, so here I am.

I’m told that there is an accepted “norm” when it comes to sexual activity. And any females that think outside the box and can’t find guys that accommodate that only have themselves to blame. The guys are only doing what society has told them is acceptable. I guess I get that, but it’s really about reading the situation. Random dude that lightly put his hand on my ass (and the ass of three other girls I was with) hoping I wouldn’t feel it? Not cool. Guy whose dick I conveniently backed into with my ass several times? Green light.

Needing to be disrespected though? Those are some issues. You can like it rough, but I don’t need someone to make me feel like shit to get my jollies. But more power to you. The porn/stripper world needs you out there.

Bottom line: test the boundaries if you want. Get freaky, get rough. But don’t spit in my face. And I am the be all, end all in this matter. I write what I want, bitches.



I had the flu, I’ve been uninspired. Excuses, excuses. Let’s get back to the business of blowjobs.

I don’t have a dick. There is no way I will ever know what it feels like for a guy. I’ve asked several people several times what a blowjob feels like. Their descriptions rarely get more detailed than, “it’s pretty good.” I guess I can’t blame them, if a guy was to ask me what it feels like to have my clit licked, I’d probably answer with an unassuming “it’s pretty good”, too. Unless they got me during the act. Then the answer would be more something like, “holy shit, fuck you.” I’m pretty eloquent. So, while I don’t know what it feels like and what makes it better, I can give you the only part of it that I understand: how it makes me feel.

As I’ve said before, new dick always gives me the giddy feeling. So “first times” always have the fun of the unknown. Is he going to like it, am I going to like it, is it different with different people? Stuff like that. It’s kind of exploratory. Finding things that “work” always make me feel good. There’s definitely a feeling of self-satisfaction when you think you’re performing…satisfactorily. Certain parts of the skin just feel better against your tongue. There’s always a mini-challenge with yourself: “how far can I take it this time?” and you give yourself an inner high five when you’ve hit as far as you can go. 

Sometimes, it takes longer than you think it should and you think it means either he’s trying to make it last or (*gasp) you’re failing. There is always the worry that it’s the latter. And sometimes you feel bad about it. But other times your inner monologue is thinking, “hurry up and blow your load already.” Which kind of makes you laugh in your head. But right now, I’m thinking of all those times I thought that and feeling bad that it might have been me failing. Stupid inner reflection. Damn me for starting this entry! Anyway… 

Then there’s the finish. It should be said (even though I’ve mentioned it in the past) that before I ever sucked a dick, I thought it was strictly for guys. I saw the movies and heard the talk that made it always seem like a favor or an obligation. A special treat. But when it starts to build up and he’s getting close. It feels like I could get close, too. I have never finished by giving a blowjob…and I don’t know anyone that has. I’m pretty sure it’s a physical impossibility. But I can totally feel the buildup with him. And when he finishes I usually feel something. As I think about it, maybe it’s just a feeling of… accomplishment? Hehe, is that vain to say? I’ve totally had to calm down from giving a blowjob the way a guy has to calm down from cumming. So, it’s definitely an experience for the girl, too.

So, guys… what does a blowjob feel like?

Tags: blowjobs

My Strange Addiction

Sucking dick can be an addiction. When you have it, you want it all the time. You’re still taking a dick out of your mouth and already wanting to schedule the next one. When no one is readily available you get irritable and…bitchy. You constantly think about the act and maybe even create a website/blog devoted to it. Mostly you romanticize it and only the good parts come to mind. At times like this, I often find myself wishing I were more slutty. If I weren’t so picky with what I put in my mouth, I could fulfill the want more often. But if it ever got to that, I really would feel like a junkie.

Going through a dry spell is a lot like grieving. You go through many of the same stages. You go through the anger and bargaining (Oh, yeah??? Well, I’m just going to suck anyone and everyone’s dick!), then the depression ( I don’t even want to suck anyone’s dick!), and finally- the acceptance (Sigh, I guess I will just never suck dick again. It was a good run….). After a certain amount of time between blowjobs, I always contemplate retirement. I consider that maybe I’ve just reached a certain age where it isn’t supposed to be part of my skill set anymore. Or that I’ve hit the magic number and I just can’t do it anymore. I come to terms with it and am actually content with the decision.

Until it comes around again. Then, like a junkie who has fallen off the wagon, I’m rabidly wanting my next hit. It’s a cycle. And it’s fun…except the dry spell part. That part is lame.

Tags: blowjobs drugs